So I started off this week feeling aMAzing! On Monday when I did my 'unassisted squats' (ie. not the ones with my back pressed up against the wall - fancy term I know - I have trouble keeping up myself! :P), instead of feeling like an underqualified bowl of jelly wobbling my way up and down in agony and helplessness on the verge of collapse, I actually felt muscles doing what they're apparently meant to do, lifting me up and down, and I had a brief glimpse of why superfit people with muscles don't hate exercising!!
I even told James about it!
Apparently, if it's not hard, it's not working. That's what James says. What he means is, if you don't feel like a hopeless mess who's on the verge of collapse, you're not working.
By Saturday's routine I was actually sobbing between sets.
YOU try squatting with 15kgs! (If you do this all the time, I don't want to hear about it.)
After picking the weight up I put it back down and started laughing - I really thought it was a joke. James looked at me like I was a little left of center and assured me he wasn't joking. I realised he was serious and tightened my position - "No James, I literally, can't do that! I can barely pick them up, let alone lift them as part of an exercise!". James then looked at me very seriously (but still like I was a crazy person) and promised me I could do it. He wasn't budging! I tried to reassure him again but he remarked with a little irritation that I just needed to stop 'sooking'. I think that's when I lost it - I wasn't sooking, I was serious!! So James said 'Okay, do whatever you want then' and walked away (to go and do the dishes - isn't he great? lol) leaving me to it. So I channelled my immense anger at his overconfidence and the 'sooking' remark into sobbing through 4 sets of squats, lunges, pull-ups and some arm thing that absolutely killed with the horrible impossible weights wobbling at the ends of my pathetically weak arms!
I then began my tread-milling with a vengeance, but sadly my heart rate was high from the crazy weights and I had to walk a ridiculously slow 0.8k/hr till it calmed down. It was like trying to make a dramatic exit and closing your dress in the door behind you or something - a little bit pathetic. It did calm me down eventually though, enough to apologise to James for getting upset when he was trying to help me. I did point out in my apology that he was pretty hard on me though! James: Hard on you?! You did 4 sets, completely unassisted! I was being easy on you, you just need to stop sooking and do it! (sigh). We are definitely from different planets lol.
BUT guess what ?! I am 2kg's down!!! Only 6ish to go!! And I look better and feel better and fit clothes better!!! :)
No matter how much I complain to him when I feel like he's giving me impossible tasks, I am so grateful that James is helping and supporting me so much, and watching the girls to give me time to work out!! I'm going to have to stop trying to tell him things are too hard because he said he doesn't want to have to argue with me every day and may stop helping me if I keep 'sooking' (hmph!). James assures me building the weight won't make me look too muscled, just help me be fit and strong, so I'll try really hard.
This week some friends came over for dinner and I made chocolate profiteroles for dessert for my one treat for the week and I've got to say - having one fabulous treat a week instead of lots of everyday treats may even be worth the wait! And the weight! :)
2 weeks of this crazy fit lifestyle down, 10 to go - unless I become bodywashed and have to keep it up! I wonder :)
PS: I'm sooo winning this - I get like, 500 bonus points for every kg I lose! Our children are going to be sooo impressed by my name on that trophy ;)