Hey little personal blog/journal!!
It's been a little while since I've written anything remotely interesting on here, and I'm going to unashamedly blame it on being pregnant once again!!! :) Yay!! :) I'm just over 16 weeks now though, and have been getting better over the last 4 weeks - I've been pretty great for the last 2, but I'm tired a lot, the usual :)
Since I've been well again though, I've been spending my more awake time having lots of fun and outings with my fabulous girls, who were so patient with me for all those weeks when I lay on the couch uselessly, asking them to be gentle with me and basically being no fun at all!! I am so GRATEFUL that James took a month off work completely during uni holidays, and got us through the worst of it, and by the time he started back full time (between work and study) I was getting back into it.
It's funny how hard morning sickness hits. I guess a lot of people never get it, and if you're not grateful for that, you should be. Because it's awful! - You just feel like you're dying!!! I kept saying to James "This is MUCH worse than the other two times - I'm dying! This is awful! I can't do this for 8 more weeks" and so on, but he just said "It's exactly the same sweetie, you've just forgotten! But you'll get through it and you'll be okay" :) . He took care of absolutely everything for us - meals, cleaning, looking after the girls, looking after me, running around town trying to satisfy my horrible cravings (I don't have fun cravings. I've mentioned this before on this blog. But it's more like "I need a Red Rooster chicken drumstick now or I'll die!" and less like "Hm... I'm craving chocolate. Please go and buy me 3 blocks and I will eat them and chill out :)). I was also probably insufferable to be around. I devoured I don't know how many books, until I ran out, and became bored and more miserable. I watched a bunch of movies and then got sick of them all. I watched the entire first 4 seasons of Chuck. Bless funny, random, light hearted shows you've never seen before for trying to take your mind off things!! I felt like such a bad mother. The girls ran riot if James ever went out, and I just felt sooo bad for them! - Bored and cooped up all the time! I'm so glad James was around to take them out and do stuff with them. And he and Ana developed a wonderful relationship - the kind he's always had with Maggie but Ana's missed out on a little in her early days, because he was home a lot more when Maggie was born and has been a lot busier since Ana. But they really bonded and it's wonderful to see now :) She just adores him, and he her. And Maggie loved having her main man around all the time!
By the end of the sickness, I started to feel like I was crazy, and maybe it was all in my head? Maybe I was just lazy? So I'd try to do more, and fail miserably, and end up in bed, much worse than before. I just felt like I wasn't being a very good person. And I never wanted to go out and do anything! I would make plans with friends and then cancel cause I wasn't up to it, and I felt like such a bad friend! But then I started to have days where I was actually well, and then you realise "Oh, I'm not a bad person - I'm not just lazy! I was actually really,
really sick!!! Oh my word I feel great today!! I am going to clean my house and take the girls to the park!! And catch up with friends!! And make dinner!!" and it's just the most incredible feeling ever. I keep saying to James "I just can't describe it. It's like you're in this horrible black hole and you can't get better no matter what and then you start to doubt yourself and you don't know if you're lazy or what and then suddenly you're better! And you realise that health is the most incredible blessing, and you don't ever realise how wonderful it is until you're stuck in that black hole for weeks on end, terrified that this time it won't end at 14 weeks!" I don't know how the wonderful strong women (like my mother, who had 7 of us!) who are sick for the entire 9 months manage! I find it extremely difficult to get through the first three months.
But as a result of that time, the last few weeks have been absolutely fabulously blissful. I'm back!! And the girls and I have been having a lot of fun, and making up for all our time lost. They are SUCH great girls, and I feel so lucky to get to hang out with them all day long! They are the funniest ages and they have me in stitches all day, and they're so sweet and kind and funny!!! And James and I have been leaving the house again - we even went to the temple last Friday night, and we're going to our Stake Ball tomorow night! - I don't know how I'll go fatigue-wise, but I'm super excited.
As usual, I put on WAY too much weight during trimester 1, but I've evened out a little just in the last couple of weeks, and I've come to terms with the fact that to help me feel a little better during that time, I just have to constantly eat, and to me it's a LOT easier to work out and lose the weight afterwards, than to try and stop myself from eating whatever I want during trimester 1!! But hopefully I can repeat Ana's pregnancy, not the 30+kg's I put on with Maggie!!
And I am starting to get INCREDIBLY excited as I enter trimester 2, realising that I'm really going to be able to have another baby!! I'm always a little too nervous during the first 12 weeks to let myself be really excited, in case anything happens, but yesterday I went to the hospital and heard this little baby's heart beating for the first time, and in a few weeks we'll be able to find out whether it's a boy or girl, and I can't WAIT!!! That is my favourite part of pregnancy. I love knowing what we're having. It really helps me bond with baby. We name it and talk to it, and I buy it pink or blue (pink so far, but it could be blue this time?! :)) and get everything ready for it, and it feels so much more real. I can't wait!! James is pretty excited too :) And so are Maggie and Ana.
So basically everything is complete sunshine at the moment, especially compared to being so sick - ugh!
Random bits and pieces:
- The fabulous Stacey came over the other week, and introduced us to 'Monopoly Deal', the card version of Monopoly. Games only take maybe 15 minutes max. each, and it's a lot of fun. I bought it for James for D.A.D (Daddy Appreciation Day) recently, and we've played it so many times he's sick of it, but I'm totally addicted!! :)
- My friend Estelle came over this afternoon to have some stamping fun with me, and she brought us dinner - uncooked. I'm always saying I wish I were more confident cooking fish cause I love it, so she brought me the uncooked ingredients, and helped me prepare the fish for cooking, and all I have to do is chuck it in the oven half an hour before we want to eat!! Isn't that sweet?! Dinner and a cooking lesson!! :)
- My Dad got broken into at his office again the other day. It's happened a lot in the last year, and caused him a lot of grief and business loss, and it's really upsetting for our whole family I think. Dad is just such a good person, and he works SOOOOO HARD and has my whole life, to support his family, and to have people just break in and take so much from him, is so hard to see. They've been installing all sorts of security measures over the last year, and they just keep coming back. This time, they actually like, dug a hole and broke through the bottom of a wall, and like, climbed in underground?! - Who does that?!!! Anyway, they've had builders reinforce it all and I think they're putting in a new alarm system this time. We are all praying that they stay away and that this break-in doesn't cause too much more grief than replacing all the valuable things in the office.
- I had to quit netball when I was only a little bit pregnant :( I really, really wanted to keep playing, and stay fit during this pregnancy, but even though I switched out from Center and started playing on the wings, I was sick and fainting after games, and then you know, spent a really long time in bed doing nothing but being sick, and now I can't go back during this pregnancy. I guess I'll save the organised sport for between pregnancies!
- James is in his last 6 months of uni. Can you tell I'm grinning like a cheshire cat while I write this?! Who knows where he'll be working this time next year?!!!! He has certainly worked hard for this degree, I'm so happy and excited for him, and for our whole family!!! He will be so relieved to have a break from assignments hanging over his head all the time - I still seem to remember that feeling with perfect clarity!!
- This baby is due, 4 days before Maggie's 3rd birthday. I'm guessing we won't be throwing her too big a party this year - I might miss it!!!
- Mum is currently designing her and Dad's new house. I can't wait to see what it ends up looking like!! I couldn't do all the planning she is. Well, at least, I really wouldn't want to. Fortunately James will be just as keen as she is in that department - I'll just give him a list of what I want and let him do what he thinks with the rest of it when it comes our time! Mum always makes things so beautiful though, so I can see why she'd want to do it herself!! Meanwhile they're in a cute rental, and our childhood house is long sold to a young couple who are just starting a family. I haven't driven past since they sold it. I was so sick I didn't even take photos in every room and do any sort of 'goodbye wonderful house I lived in for 17 years!!' tour - which I SO would have done otherwise!!
- Elders Ben and Oliver have been on their missions for a year and 4 months now. Isn't that crazy?! They'll be home apparently before I know it, but it seems to be going awfully slowly!! We all miss them like crazy, but we're so proud of them. They are working so hard and being so faithful and good!! They make us smile whenever we think of them. I still can't believe they haven't met Ana!!
- James is working with Dad at the moment. I like to think of them working together - My two favourite guys!! :) He's also coaching 3 teams at JPC and helping out with some of the PE classes there. He's loving what he's doing, but it's certainly keeping him busy!!
- I lost some of my all time, FAVOURITE maternity clothes, and I'm devastated!! James thinks I must've accidentally taken them to Vinnies, and I just want to cry when I think about it! Went maternity shopping the other weekend and found nothing. I wish I had my pretty clothes back, sigh!!!
- The J's live down the road now! First I was sick, and since we've all had sick babies, but we're going over tomorow for a fun play (Jessima's put together a 'safari' which sounds fun!) and are happy that they're in our ward and we see them more often!! :)
- Baby Hallie = SO CUTE!! :) And Beth = earth mother!! : ) We're planning on a visit next week - even though she's a lot closer now, the Gold Coast seems so far away at the moment! - But they do live pretty far south. Hopefully more catch ups soon :)
- Ana and Maggie are so cute. Did I say that already?! They're best friends, they are both chatting (Ana only says a few intelligible words, but she's expanding her vocab rapidly(!) and Maggie will talk your ear off, all day, about everything :)) I'm in parenting heaven. I'm so grateful for them and can't wait to find out what this baby is and then meet it in a few months!!! :)
Okay, My fish is going in the oven, so I'm going to go and watch it. Hopefully I'll update more regularly soon, but I'm happy to say our little family blog is going strong, and I've been posting weekly on our new creative blog, so I'm sure enough of our little family history is being recorded - maybe just not giant posts about how awful morning sickness is, and how great life is afterwards :)
Have a fabulous Thursday!!! :) (Don't you love Thursdays?! They're definitely one of my favourite days - so much hope on a Thursday I think!! :))
xoxox